Mashed Potatoes Are DELICIOUS

Yeah, random, but delicious nonetheless. I love potatoes in any form. They're delicious. And sweet potatoes for that matter. Homemade is always better when it comes to anything- fries, mashed, you name it. But I have a love obsession with Bob's Evans microwavable mashed potatoes that you can purchase next to the meat section in the grocery store.



They are the most delicious, creamy concoction I've ever put in my mouth. I could literally eat them every single day. I just thought I would share this in case anyone shares my love of potatoes. They also make really good mac n cheese. You're welcome!

My feet hurt!

This is random, but it is something very present in my life right now, so I think it's worthwhile to talk about. I, along with the help of the internet, have diagnosed myself with plantar fasciitis. And if you have ever experienced it, you know it's no joke. There is a difference between having foot pain from being on your feet all day and having unbearable, on the verge of tears, intense foot pain. I have the latter. I don't know everything about it, but from what I've read, it is definitely what I am experiencing.

Basically it is super intense pain in my heels. It feels like I am walking on broken glass. Or broken foot bones. It hurts when I'm not walking, but it is 100x worse when I am walking. I put insoles in my shoes and tried many different pairs of shoes, but nothing really helps. Foot stretches help while I'm doing them, but I obviously can't do them while I'm walking. I am guessing it started from suddenly being on my feet more than normal, but it is literally horrible. I end up waddling by the end of the day and doing anything to avoid walking. It's not pleasant. From what I've read, it seems that it eventually goes away on its' own and you can do exercises/ice your feet/use ibuprofen to stop swelling/elevate your feet, but in the meantime I am ready to cry.

Anyone ever experience this??

Supernatural Reaction Season 9 Episode 19

This is my reaction to the Supernatural Season 9 Episode 19 entitled "Alex Annie Alexis Ann" I'm getting straight in to spoilers so SPOILER WARNING. Also, if  you ever want to read my live tweets, I live tweet every episode. Find me on twitter @stephtuma This was an old school vampire hunting episode with our old pal Sheriff Mills. It was one of the "filler episodes" that isn't part of the main problem they're dealing with (In this case, Abaddon for the demon side and Metatron for the angel side) BUT it wasn't for nothing. We got to see Jody Mills, which was needed. I love how the writers bring back old characters and don't leave us with unanswered questions. We invest in the characters and the writers know that. They are super talented. Yeah, they break our hearts sometimes, but I think the fact that they have the ability to get us so attached to characters that it emotionally hurts us when bad things happen to them speaks volumes about their abilities.

I'm not going to recap the whole episode, but some highlights are:

-Dean is even more aggressive than normal. The mark IS taking a toll. It is subtle to me, because let's be honest, he was always aggressive...that's what I love about him, but it is noticeable. He overpowered a vampire and cut off its' head after demanding it to "look at me, bitch!" Feisty.

-We got to see where Sheriff Mills has been. She is super bad ass and able to hunt. She killed a couple vamps! But she is hurting from the loss of her son and husband still. She was blinded by that when a young girl who was raised by vampires came to them. We'll call her Alex, because that's what she was called in the show even though her name was changed. It's confusing.

-Sam and Dean are pretty decent in their relationship. When Dean rescued Sam after he was being drained of blood by a vampire, Dean said "yeah, yeah. you wouldn't do the same for me" or something along those lines, so obviously it is something still on his mind, which I don't blame him.

I love the show so much, but I am really getting nervous about this Abaddon/Metatron thing. They need to kill them so I can rest easier. The fact that they're off doing other things while these two run wild makes me SO anxious.

Oopises! Where I've Been + All That Jazz

I sincerely apologize for almost 2 weeks with no posts. I don't want to make excuses, but here's what happened:

1) I got sick
2) I had to work
3) Working while sick made me super tired
4) Then I got an ear infection when I was just getting over my cold (I have a history with bad ears, so it was a doozy)
5) I had NO days off. Every day I had something to do. By the time I got home, I was exhausted.

SOOOOO a lot of things got neglected. Laundry and hair included. Lots of buns worn. I even ran out of clean pajamas.I will try my best to make sure that never happens again. If it does, you can be sure I will at least semi-update on twitter. Follow me @stephtuma

So here is to getting back in the swing of things.

Supernatural Scenes

Another week without Supernatural, another week of my creativity happening :D

When someone tried to take the last piece of pie. 

Kid riding his bike too close to the impala.

Remembering the time the leviathans ruined cheeseburgers for him. 

When he found a moose themed man-thong on Sam's bed.

When Cas makes a comment about his hair.

After Crowley makes yet another suggestive comment.

Thinking about what the leviathans did to his beloved cheeseburgers again.

After Dean makes fun of his professionally typed back story he asks him to memorize.

Walking in on Cas doing some pizza boy moves...alone.

At least I crack myself up, right?

Being Sad

I sometimes write my posts early and schedule them to post so I can be sure on days when I'm busy I still get a post done. Today that happened. This post was written at almost midnight on 4/3/14. And I am sad. There is really no particular, specific reason for this. And it came out of nowhere. But it's definitely real. I have been working to be positive and it really helps more than I can express. But it surely doesn't mean I'm always happy. The more I think of it, the more I realize I'm not at a place where I want to be in my life. I'm making steps to fix that, but it doesn't happen overnight. It takes time. And a lot of effort. There are so many things I want to happen and for various reasons they're not happening. I don't have enough money. I don't have the support. I am worried about what other people will think. I feel like I'm being held back by some people/circumstances and feel selfish for thinking that. I love my family and put so much of my happiness in them, which isn't fair for me or them. I struggle with how to portray my feelings to others. I don't want to be clingy. And I don't want to be distant. I get lonely, but I like my alone time. I give everyone so much power over me. Things people say to me sometimes REALLY get to me. It makes me question myself and I already am unsure of everything. Life is confusing.

I'm glad I'm making positive steps to better myself, but at the same time, I'm angry things aren't just going to happen and realistically may never happen the way I want them to. I have spent so much time waiting and wishing my life away to better times, but they don't just happen. And in my personal life, seeing my grandparents and parents getting older and things are changing, while I'm pretty much staying the same. Stuck in this situation. It makes me just want to cry. I'm not a kid anymore. Things aren't all fun. I have to do things I don't want. I have to take care of myself. And I feel unable- or unready- to and that makes me feel less than. At my age, I SHOULD be. But who dictates that? I have conflicted views of what I want my future to look like and my inability to decide leads to NO progress.  I just feel glum. And I can shake the feeling. Rant over. Back to pandora, which is playing a whole lotta sad music for a 90's station.

My Humor and why Being Politically Correct Bugs Me

I do not know why, but I saw this on tv the other day and found it HILARIOUS! Granted it was 3 am and it had been a long day, but this is totally my kind of humor. So first watch this short clip from American Dad:


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MlWGaQtL47I

Now, let's discuss:

1) The fact that a dad would even say that makes me laugh. I appreciate a good parent, but I would totally be that parent would says things just to get a reaction. Occasionally my mom will say something like "don't do that or i'm going to kick you in the face" or my dad will make a witty, but not nice comment jokingly and it just makes me laugh because that's not what a typical parent says.

2) How does the kid dancing or just being friendly/having fun get him molested?

3) It's just a random situation that I feel like would probably never happen, which makes it funnier. Imagine hearing a parent say that in public? I would laugh out loud.

PS I am not saying child molesting is funny. It's sick and messed up, but this is a cartoon and very clearly not a real situation. Political correctness bugs me. People take things too seriously and worry about how what they say will get taken.

Clint Eastwood speaks very candidly about it and I agree.

“People have lost their sense of humor. In former times we constantly made jokes about different races. You can only tell them today with one hand over your mouth or you will be insulted as a racist. I find that ridiculous. In those earlier days every friendly clique had a ‘Sam the Jew’ or ‘Jose the Mexican,’ but we didn’t think anything of it or have a racist thought. It was just normal that we made jokes based on our nationality or ethnicity. That was never a problem. I don’t want to be politically correct."

 I don't know how this turned into THIS, but hey, it's relevant. 

James Franco Instagram Controversy

I'm sure everyone has heard of this. But if not, in short apparently a 17 year old fan met James Franco at a showing of his play "Of Mice And Men". She took an instagram video and he told her to tag him in it. Later they got to private chatting on instagram (you can do that?!) and eventually texting. He was going to get a hotel room and wanted her to go there. Basically he was supposedly trying to hook up with a 17 year old. He's like 35, but either way, she's 17. And that's weird. And illegal. (Even though some people say consent is 17 in NY, idk..still weird) Ps she didn't go through with it, instead just "leaked" the conversation. I can't imagine a young girl saying no to James Franco, though. That alone makes it seem unlikely.

Some people are saying it's a publicity stunt for his new movie "Palo Alto", which is about an older coach (him) having a relationship with a high schooler. If it is, that is messed up publicity. Too far for my tastes. Not something to joke about. If not, I'm surprised he would be so blatant about it. He is a smart guy. To be having a conversation sending pics and even personalized pics seems weird to me. He has been known to go after younger girls, so there's that. Also, he's a guy and however much it disgusts me, this is kind of typical for most guys. (Even though every time a celeb guy gets caught in something like this, I lose even more respect for the male species.) I'm unsure of the truth of it, and he isn't doing much to dispel the rumor.

Here is an interesting article discussing it: http://www.dailydot.com/entertainment/james-franco-lucy-clode-palo-alto/

Thoughts?

Healthy Tips for Lazy Girls

Yeah, I'm not the number one person anyone comes to for health advice, BUT as I am getting older, I am more conscious over the way my body feels and how doing certain things affect it. So here is my list of tips and tricks to be healthier without too much effort. You're welcome.

FOOD TIPS

*Water! Drink it as much as you can. Let yourself have pop occasionally, but limit yourself. Some people don't like water, as it can get boring. I find the colder, the better it is so add ice! And if you are really bored, add a crystal light packet. No sugar and virtually nothing bad for you in it. Lemon iced tea is one of my faves.

*Don't chew sugar gum. It's unnecessary sugar, bad for your teeth, and sugar-free gum is just as sweet.

*Eat when you're hungry. Several small meals is better than a couple large meals. Don't let yourself get super hungry before you eat or you will eat everything in sight.

*HEALTHY SNACKS*

*One of my favorite, go-to healthy snacks is perfect if you have a sweet tooth. Cut up a granny smith ( or whatever kind you prefer) apple into slices. Dip in flavored Greek yogurt. (Creamier and more protein than normal yogurt! I like blueberry) OR make your own fruit dip...take vanilla Greek yogurt, add a teaspoon stevia, and a couple shakes of cinnamon. YUM!

*Hummus and pita chips are a healthier option than chips and dip and just as satisfying. Have an open mind! I would have never thought I'd like them.

EXERCISE-ish

*My room is upstairs so I'm up and down several times a day. Every time I am going up to my room or upstairs in general, I will skip every other step. A great way work those thighs.

*I love biking. I don't have gears on my bike so going uphill can be challenging. Especially after a long winter of being unable to ride, my body is not used to it. My trick to get back into bike shape is start out riding down the street. Every day go a little farther and soon you'll be riding miles!

*STRETCHES! It may seem weird, but it makes such a difference. Do simple exercises to strength your back muscles. From someone who has pulled a back muscle, it's important to have a strong back. It's so hard to describe without pictures, but some of my favorites are: getting on all fours and arching like a halloween kitty and laying like you're going to do a sit-up, but raising your pelvis instead.

halloween kitty 

this is FINE for beginners, just don't hold forever!

This one is really good too. You can def feel it in your back.

Wii fit yoga and strength training are really good to get ideas and learn proper techniques. I always enjoy a nice stretch. 

Keep in mind, I'm NO expert, but these tips have worked great for me. Don't worry about being perfect. Just focus on adding healthier options to your day.

Supernatural is NOT on this week so I write an episode...

WHY does Supernatural have to keep taking weeks off?!!!! I mean, it's good that they are stretching out the season, but I HATE having to go weeks for a new episode. I watched the first 8 seasons one after the other on netflix, so it was super hard to get used to not having episodes available on demand. NOW I have to wait at least a week, a lot of times longer. It does give the episode more time to sink in and more time for me to reflect on it, but as a fan girl, I really dislike not getting to see my boys kicking new butt every week. So to hold us until the next episode, I have concocted my own storyline of what I would love to happen, complete with pictures. ENJOY! :)


Sam is about to work a case, when he catches his long locks in the impala door. He realized it is time to get a hair cut. (Ps this picture makes me lol)


Dean dresses up and takes me on a nice date.


Bobby gains the ability to come back and visit whenever he wants. He has lots of heartwarming moments with the boys. And makes Sam realize Dean just cares about him so he needs to stop being a baby. The boys make up.


Kevin and everyone else get out of the veil and go to heaven. Kevin somehow comes back as a normal non-prophet and can resume his life. He keeps in touch with the boys, but stays out of danger.


Cas experiments with his style and finds a nice girlfriend. Does pizza boy stuff with her. People stop trying to make destiel happen.


Crowley wants to be more human and gets blood without killing people, also making him a nicer person. He doesn't mess with the boys and helps them kill Abaddon. He then runs hell more effectively and keeps demons under control. Those who don't listen are punished.


Cain takes his mark back and Dean is no longer burdened by it.


Metatron dies a horrible death, is sent to purgatory forever, and no one tells him stories anymore.


The boys take a vacation at the spa to live a normal life for a couple weeks. (The main point is we get to see this again)


Cas and his trenchcoat try to figure out how to get PB&J to stop tasting like molecules.


Dean does some light reading..


Charlie comes back from Oz and fills the boys in on her awesome adventures. They have fun catching up and she goes back to exploring, checking in with them occasionally.


We see them happy and hot.

Dean when I jokingly tell him I scratched baby.

Ok, I could go on forever. I'll end it for now, but I'm sure you'll see more of my storylines soon :D

April Fool's Day

Every single year my mom tries to prank me on april fool's day. Over the years, I have gotten much better at not believing her. One time when I was in either middle school or very early high school, she woke me up at like 5 am freaking out that I missed the bus. If you know me, I love sleep, and was not amused. She has called me saying she fell down the stairs and needed to go to the hospital. It is a thing. And I've NEVER been able to prank her. No matter how hard I try. Except the one time (not on april fool's day) I gave her a fake lottery ticket and she cried that she "won" $10,000. I don't know why she takes it so seriously, but it's kind of funny in hindsight. So here are some pranks I found online. I don't recommend all of them. Be funny, but be nice!

This would be funny. Just put it on in a way that wouldn't ruin the car paint.

This would be a funny wallpaper to replace someone's wallpaper with. Just be careful who you 

do it to. Some people are naturally angry and seeing their computer "broken" may inspire

them to break it further. Don't let it go that far!

This isn't really a prank you can pull on someone, but it would be funny to see 

the reaction of the cashier. I always thought it would be funny to go through

on a bike. Their reactions might be super hilarious.

LOL imagine showering in chicken broth. And at least you're already in the shower, 

so after you take it out you can take a real shower.

This is just mean AND a waste of caramel. 

Also cruel. I'm so not into food pranks. I would be so mad if I thought

there were doughnuts & realized there weren't. 

This would be kinda funny to watch. It would be like a grenade going off and 

all you can do is stay out of the line of fire. At least it would smell good.

I've done this one before and it's always funny unless you're the person getting sprayed.

Happy Pranking!

TV Time: The Middle

I don't have cable. And one show that I've gotten into based on my very limited antenna tv options is "The Middle" And it is FUNNY! They play reruns at night and I try to stay up from midnight to 1 am to watch. I have been known to laugh out loud at times, like when Frankie ate Axl's toenails on accident. Cause how?! If you haven't seen the show, this may contain spoilers. Their family is just hilarious. I mean, it does slightly bother me that they don't seem to devote the necessary time to teaching and nurturing their kids. But I do realize they do the best they can with what they have and they obviously love their kids.

Speaking of kids... Axl is just funny. He is so thick headed. But 1) he's cute, let's be real and it's ok cause he's really not as young as he plays on tv. and 2) the small amount of times he does sweet things for Sue makes me so happy. I am SUCH a sucker for good siblings. (ahem Dean Winchester) I think you should be there for your siblings. I always wanted a big brother. Is it too late, or...? And Sue. I feel so bad for her. She is just oblivious to how uncool and awkward she is. At least I know that about myself. And how she has no idea Brad is gay. haha. Oh Sue. Brick is all kinds of strange, but I relate to his book loving, keep-to-yourself attitude. They whole whisper under the breath thing is half funny/half annoying. And omg the episode where they didn't make him cross the bridge drove me nuts. But overall, I like all the kids.

And the parents.. I wish Mike would be more involved in his kids' lives. Like how he's uncomfortable talking to Sue. That shouldn't be a thing. And how the kids act so surprised if they want to do something as a family because that's not how they do things. Frankie is kind of frantic, but she does have to pick up a lot of the slack.

Overall, I think it's so funny to watch. So if you haven't, give it more than one try. The first time, I thought it was weird, but it grows on you.

Dwelling never helped anyone

Do you remember being little and the dumb fights you would get into with your siblings? The stupid things you would get mad about? At the time, they meant everything and were completely valid. Looking back, they were foolish. I was thinking about this the other day. I spent SO much time getting angry about ridiculous things. But you can rationalize that to kids. I sure as heck didn't listen to my parents when they tried telling me it wasn't something to get upset over. And my dad always said when I was older I understand. He was right. He always is. Experience is the greatest teacher.

It just really makes me frustrated all the time I wasted being mad for essentially no reason. That's another reason why I feel so strongly about being positive. I was the absolute worst dweller. When something upset me, I would constantly think about it and constantly feel bad wishing it could have went differently. But unless you're a time traveler (which I sadly am not), you cannot go back in time and work things in your favor. I remember in high school it got so bad, I would visualize putting my problems into a suitcase and letting them go. And it did help. But adulthood stresses led to anxiety and it was difficult to manage. If something happens that would normally make me angry, I try to think:

Will this matter tomorrow? Next week? Next month? Next year? In 5 years?

Focusing on the bigger picture, really puts your little issues into perspective. Things that seem like a huge deal at the time, most likely aren't. So next time you're in a similar situation, remember the things you thought were such an issue as a child and what they mean to you now. It will really make you think.

About Me Ramble

I like lemon iced tea. I like smelling good. Animals make me more happy than most people. But the people I love mean more to me than anything. I check the shower for murderers every time I use the bathroom. I don't know what I would do if I found one. I like to make boring things pretty. I'm craftier in my head than I am with my hands. I've superglued my hands together and to other things more times than I'd like to admit. I seriously dislike not having nail polish on. It bothers me if I'm not wearing any. Or if it chips. I'm completely fascinated and borderline obsessed with science fiction: parallel universes, space, time travel, conspiracy theories... I have a lot of clothes, but I never have anything to wear. I have an abundance of sweatpants and stretchy pants. I think I have ruined wearing jeans for myself. I also have multiple pairs of fleece pajama pants. They're awesome. My life is a constant struggle between wanting long and short hair. It's such a hard choice. I also have the same problem with short or long nails. I'm pretty sure I perfected the art of recreational sleeping. People who say sleep is a waste of time or say they don't like it, don't know what life is. I enjoy casual bike rides. With the wind breezing through my hair and my legs burning from exertion. It's relaxing. Little things mean a lot to me. When I look at the night sky and see all the stars, I'm always amazed. I just looked around my room and am a little embarrassed of the amount of zebra print items I have. But not really. They're awesome. Stretching my legs always makes a part of my heart light up. Except when I get charliehorses. But that doesn't happen much anymore. It used to a lot. When I was younger, I would wake up screaming during the night in pain and my dad would rub the knots out. One time I had about 8 charliehorses while in the middle of the pool. I could have easily drowned. I have to physically force myself to do something with my hair on a daily basis. Sometimes I don't win. Throwing it in a bun is so much easier. I have super thick, easily-knotted hair. I used to cry getting it brushed. Sometimes I get angry brushing it. Combs are not an option. Ever. I have a strange habit of forgetting words. Like really basic words. I don't know why. I will end up describing the meaning to people to figure out what it was and they think it's weird I couldn't remember such an everyday word. I think I remember things more than the average person. Sometimes time flies and it all blends together, but I remember details. Aging is no lie. I can really see and feel changes in my body, skin, energy, etc. and I'm only 24. I'm terrified of wrinkles. I trip a lot. Over everything AND nothing.

Supernatural Season 9 Episode 17 Reaction

This is my reaction for the season 9 "Supernatural" episode 17 entitled "Mother's Little Helper" Every week, I live tweet while watching the newest episode, but this week I especially highly recommend checking out my twitter @stephtuma . Misha Collins aka Castiel directed the episode and also live tweeted my time zone and he had quite a lot of gems, many of which I retweeted. He is so funny. The episode was really good. We got to see some more depth info on the situation at hand, especially the origins of Abaddon. There is no way for me to discuss this without SPOILERS so this is my warning.

First off, we have Dean, dealing with his reservations on what the mark of Cain is doing to him. So while he is "researching" aka drinking, Sam is off doing some investigating about murders in a town committed by seemingly normal citizens.

While at the police station, Sam meets an older woman who used to be a nun and was there when their grandfather, Henry, and the men of letters were investigating possessions at the convent. There was a woman of letters named Josie and she looks very familiar because she is now the vessel of Abaddon. But she didn't always used to be that way. Upon finding out what the nuns were up to (which I'm not even really sure what that was), Henry got knocked out and the nun which Abaddon was in was going to possess him. Josie sacrificed herself because she was secretly in love with Henry, who was already married and had John (the boys' dad) So Abaddon took over Josie's body and Josie went back with Henry like normal. Which is how she got inside the men of letters. At the time, they were not super aware of possessions and all that stuff. Plus, they were not hunters. They were there to have knowledge. So it slipped by. The older woman saw this all happen and didn't tell anybody because she feared for her life.

Dean runs into Crowley at the bar. He makes some snarky comments and also some hilarious ones (Crowley has the best lines! "You're lying to Sam like he's your wife...which kinda makes me your mistress
) He leaves to shoot up some human blood in the bathroom and a hunter tries to go in after him, but Dean stops him. Dean realizes he is afraid of what the blade is doing to him and Crowley talks to him. When Dean leaves, we see the hunter and Crowley talking. We see the hunter's eye turn black, as in he is a demon. And for some reason, Crowley was testing Dean. I'm not sure what he is trying to do. I am so conflicted about Crowley these days. He screwed them, but they are sort of after the same thing. I wish they could get along and work together. But he IS a demon. However, all this human blood may change him for the better. We can hope.

Modern day, Sam goes to the old convent where he sees a collection of souls. Abaddon is buying souls to build a demon army because there are still people in hell who aren't joining her side. A nun tries to kill Sam and chokes him when he tries exorcising her. Thankfully he had the incantation recorded on his phone. She eventually knocked it out of his hands and crushed it, but at that point he was able to sneak up behind her a kill her with a blade. He then let all the souls out so they could float back to their bodies. But there are other places all over where souls are being kept so Abaddon definitely needs to be stopped.

Sam goes back to the bunker, where Dean is finally back researching. They don't speak much and Sam doesn't tell him the whole story. At the beginning of the episode Sam was giving Dean crap for being so obsessed with finding Abaddon, but at the end of the episode, he tells him he agrees they need to find her immediately.

Storyline aside, Misha did an awesome job directing. I liked the close ups and camera angles. It was very artsy. We haven't seen Castiel in quite a few episodes, but I think we will next week since the preview showed Metatron and Gadreel. Two other people we need to deal with.

BEING POSITIVE!

I haven't really talked much about this, but I did make a video when I was starting my journey of positivity and I have since come a long way. If you haven't already, make sure to check out "The Secret". It's a movie on netflix (also a book) and it is based on the law of attraction. Basically, everything you put out into the universe, you get back. If you are constantly thinking of things you don't want to happen or bad things, that's what you're going to attract. A self-fulfilling prophecy of sorts. If you think positively, that's the kind of energy you will attract. They go as far to say everything in life is achievable if you believe and visualize yourself having it. I would love to believe it, but I think it takes effort as well.

Now even if you don't believe in this (you definitely have to be in a certain mind frame to...I wouldn't have even a few months ago), being positive is still something that can improve your life. Choosing to not let things get to you that are beyond your control, and to maintain an optimistic attitude, helps you just be happier in general. Sometimes it is hard. When things happen beyond your control, it can be hard to stay positive. It's something you have to work at, but when you do, it really makes such a difference.

 "Whether you think you can or think you can't, either way you are right" - Henry Ford

There are little things you can do to start this process. Make a vision board of all you want and look at it everyday. Put up quotes that mean something to do. They will motivate you.

Remind yourself that you are a good person. YOU ARE WORTHY! Love yourself before you expect anyone else to. Treat yourself the way you want to be treated by other people. Why would other people respect you if you don't respect yourself? It is NEVER too late, to make things right. Sure, you're not perfect, but you're working on being the best possible self. Be grateful for what you have. Decide what you want to be. How you want to feel. And focus on that. Know that everything is at the very least a learning experience. You can't control others or life, but you CAN control your reaction to things. Don't give other people the power to negatively affect your life. Choose to not let it happen.

It honestly is as simple as thinking. I wouldn't have believed it if I didn't try it. And like I said, you will have bad days where it's hard to be positive, but make an effort to be as positive as you can be. If I'm in a situation I don't like, I remind myself that it is teaching me something. Everything can be a lesson. I remind myself that I'm a good person and if other people don't see that, it is their problem, not mine. I don't let other peoples' words or opinions of me ruin my opinion of myself. I'M the only person who knows what I go through on a daily basis. Who has to live with my decisions.

I encourage other people to be positive. To be the best person they can be. I treat people the way I want to be treated. I don't say things that are mean or unnecessary. If it won't make anything better, keep your comments to yourself. I try not to complain and get down about things. Make peoples' day better. Do little things to be kind. Smile, hold open a door, whatever you can. And don't expect anything in return. Don't get mad if they don't say thank you or smile back. You don't know what anyone else is going through. Do it because it's what you would want someone to do for you. I really encourage anyone who feels sad, unhappy, stuck in their situation, etc to implement some of these things. They really have helped me SO much to be a happier person.

Over the hill?!

Yesterday was my birthday!!! And I turned 24. That is old. It is crazy to me I can be that old. My mom was already done having kids by my age. I thought I would be done with college and have my life together by now. I definitely thought I would be dating the guy I would soon marry. Yeah, life had other plans. But I'm not unhappy at where I'm at. Everything has led me to here and I think I'm figuring out things everyday. I feel blessed that I have the opportunity and support to be able to "find" myself. At times, it's hard. People don't always understand me or why I'm not just taking the normal path. I am not a typical person. .I do things my own way. I don't think I'm made for a normal everyday life. Regardless life doesn't come with a manual. I try to take everything as a learning experience. Having regrets gets you nowhere. At least if you learn something from a bad choice or situation, it wasn't for nothing.

Growing up is terrifying and horrible and times. As Taylor Swift got spot on in her song "22"

"We're happy, free, confused, and lonely at the same time. It's miserable and magical"

Exactly.

We wish our youth away, not appreciating it. Not realizing it will be over before we know it. Not knowing that being an adult isn't as fun as it looks. It's actually not fun at all, sometimes. Being responsible for yourself. Paying bills. Having to do the right thing instead of the fun thing. Having to be realistic instead of spontaneous. It's not what we thought it was.

I think this generation especially is especially burdened by this. It isn't like it used to be. College is almost necessary. And expensive. You don't just get married, move out, and live your life. You have to take care of yourself. The dating scene is insane. It just is a different era.

I know I can't be the only one who cries watching "Toy Story 3" The struggle is real. First world problem, I know. But it's a problem nonetheless. Figuring life out, while having so many other things to deal with and figure out, is HARD. It's a game of trial and error. Sometimes there is no right answer. You disappoint people along the way and realize you're the only person that can make you happy. You're the only person who knows everything that goes through your mind. You're the one that has to live with yourself. You learn to not care what people think- even though you sometimes slip and care. A lot. You question decisions and second guess yourself. You have amazing times with people who mean the world to you. And you have horrible times where you feel completely alone. When you take a breath, you realize you are lucky to have what you do. Your life isn't perfect. There are things  you wish were different. But it's your life. So you embrace it and do the best you can with it. You realize nobody ever really has their "shit together". We all just do the best with what we have. You learn your parents aren't perfect and struggle with some of the same things. You learn they're human. But you still know they have answers you do not and you constantly learn from them. You want to use your experience to help others not make mistakes and it drives you crazy when they don't listen. Everyone wants to figure out things on their own. And at the end of the day, that's exactly what I'm doing.

Eye Rubbing

Lol weird title, I know. But does anybody else exceptionally enjoy rubbing their eyes? I purposely postpone doing my eye makeup until JUST before I leave so I can rub them to my heart's content. It just feels so nice. I oftentimes forget and rub them anyway. Then my eyes start to water because I get mascara in them and I have to compulsively rub my eyes until all my eye makeup is off. Which usually requires a tissue or my shirt to help. I'm sure that's not good for my eyes and preventing wrinkles. But I can't help it! It ends up happening everyday. Last week, I got a scratch or something somehow on my inner left eyelid so I couldn't really rub it since it hurt and I wanted it to heal. It was so hard.

Ps, I probably never mentioned this, but eyes CREEP me out. Especially when there is something wrong with them. So I don't recommend researching eye rubbing if you have a weak stomach like me. EW

Omg I just found this article (everything online HAS to be true) and this is some of it:

"There's no reason to recommend rubbing at all," says McMonnies about the range of everyday situations that usually beg for a rub. "Rubbing should be avoided at all times."

So, short of sitting on your hands, how can you avoid rubbing?

McMonnies suggests:

• gently applying a clean, wet facecloth to your eyes to help reduce the itch and urge to rub or to remove sleep from your eyes in the morning.
• treating the underlying causes of dry, irritated or itchy eyes to minimise the need for rubbing. This could include avoiding known allergens or irritants, or taking your allergy medication.
• trying to manage your stress if this is the reason that you rub your eyes.

( http://www.abc.net.au/health/talkinghealth/factbuster/stories/2012/09/18/3592456.htm )

 Now I'm worried. I don't do it for any reason really other than it feels good. Does this slightly terrify me finding out it isn't recommended? YES. Will I stop rubbing my eyes? Probably not. How would you even stop that? It's like stopping eating meat. Sure people do it. But not the kind of people aka person I want to be. Please tell me other people do this casually?

Instagram Thursday!

I love instagram. I don't know why, but it's fun to share your pictures. Even if no one is looking. So I thought I'd devote today's post to sharing some of my instagram pics. If you want to follow me, you can find me there: @stephygus

litterbox holder I was working on

my cat likes flinging it EVERYWHERE

speaking of cute cats...my adorable cat yawning

polka dot roof of mouth

me looking fashionable as ever lol I mean ridiculous

hat AND cateye sunglasses....yeah not a match

beautiful Rebecca Minkoff bag I want/can't afford

I spotted at TJ Maxx

Sweet pineapple pieces I've been eating like

crazy the last couple weeks

Protactiv vending machine at the mall I went to...

I find this really funny & weird

my adorable boy enjoying a chin scratching

this face always makes my heart melt

My delish food at Texas Roadhouse. You HAVE to 

instagram your meal...it's like a rule

Scared kitty at the vet waiting for checkup & shots

What are your thoughts on instagram? Fun or annoying?

Supernatural Season 9 Episode 16 Blade Runners Reaction

I did it! I'm writing a reaction on time. Woohoo. I was nervous I wouldn't be able to live tweet this episode because it looked intense, but I did. If you ever want to check it out, I do live tweet every episode on twitter @stephtuma

This episode was episode 16 of season 9 entitled Blade Runners. It was pretty intense. They tend to pack a lot of stuff in the later episodes of every season. We finally got some answers or at least mentions about some things we were introduced to earlier this season. Sam and Dean had a pretty normal dynamic, which was awesome. Sam even got protective over Dean, which is definitely something we don't see usually. I pretty much can't get into it without spoilers, so here we go.

SPOILERS!

It started out with Dean calling Crowley, well trying to. He didn't answer. The caller id for Dean was "Not Moose" LOL But the fact that the king of hell has a cell phone is funny enough. "Too busy inflicting pain to answer, please leave a message" Crowley eventually gets back to them and tells them he has a problem. We see that he is shooting up human blood and has an accomplice, Lola, helping him get it. But Lola is really running things back to Abaddon, so Crowley kills her. But we see him experiencing humanity and emotions from the blood. The boys give Crowley an intervention and tie him up to detox. They were yelling at him and lecturing him, which was hilarious. Dean exclaimed, "You just gonna let hell go to hell?"

Crowley also mentioned in a human-blood drunk stupor the first blade to Lola so Abaddon is aware it exists. The boys all set out to try to find it. Along the the way, Sam and Dean call a demon and draw a devil's trap to catch it to interrogate it. Low and behold, they catch Snooki, which was just funny. She is so short, but looked even shorter next to Sam & Dean/Jared & Jensen. (Speaking of which, Dean just looks more attractive every episode I swear. Don't get me wrong, I like Sam, too, but he needs to do something with that hair. I like season 1 hair lol) They ask her a few questions and exorsize her. We find out even the loyalists in hell are ready to join Abaddon's side. Which is not good for Crowley.

They talk to a few people as FBI agents because they find out it may have gotten sold at an auction, which is weird to me. (one a man who Crowley quickly possessed to find out info and the other a cougar at a museum that flirted with Dean) They do some research and Crowley tells them how one men/man of letters is still around. They go to this field where they talk to him (although they can't see him) and he does a spell to open a portal to transport them into his mansion. He sends two vampires I believe to see if Sam and Dean were worthy and they quickly kill them. They tell him they are looking for the blade and after a little chat, he tells them it is behind him. Then he uses a spell to make Sam disappear, which we find out AFTER commercial is just back in the woods.

So Crowley and Sam work to get a spell to get in the mansion since it is sealed otherwise. Dean is stuck there because the guy wants to keep him. He is a real creep. He has a collection of all sorts of things and people and was excited Dean had the mark of Cain to be a set with the blade. He puts the first blade in Dean's hand and we can see the mark burning and Dean clearly experiences feelings of some sort. Sam and Crowley get in, Sam holds the guy hostage, but we find out it's a shapeshifter. While the real guy is cutting Sam, Crowley unties Dean, who kills him. And then he can't put the blade down and it consumes him, but luckily he does. I can see how this is going to be a problem in the upcoming episodes. It is doing something to him and I am afraid it is going to be bad. But at least this time, he controlled it.

They get back out to the car and see someone keyed Baby, which is not ok to Dean. It is a message for Crowley. Sam tells Dean they have no use for Crowley now and should kill him. Crowley either hears or knows something is up because he confiscates the blade and says he will give it back to Dean when he kills Abaddon. But they could kill Crowley with any angel blade or demon knife, right? So I don't know how that will fully stop them. But they do need the blade to kill Abaddon, which I want them to do. I really hate her. But I'm still mad that they brought her back in the first place. I am sure it is going to get MEGA intense.

Spring Trends

I have been paying more attention to fashion and style lately. I mean, I'll never be a slave for the trends. That's just not me. I am into comfort above all else. But I do like trying new things. Something I have been major into lately that is really big this season is floral prints. I think they're so dainty and girly and just adorable. I'm going old lady chic. I got an antique floral dish at a thrift store and use it to store most worn jewelry and I just ADORE it!


I also have been really into pastels, which is something I really didn't used to be. Pale pinks, pale purples, baby blues, and mint green have been colors I've been gravitating to. Just colors in general, too. I have found an unnatural obsession with sweatpants and I decided not to fight it. So I got some in purple, red, and teal. And I can't wait to find cute ways to dress them up. Yep. I'm the girl that has hair (yes, I finally stopped myself from throwing my hair in buns everyday) and makeup done, wears a cute shirt, and is rocking the sweats. Holla.


I have also been getting more into jewelry. I have kind of always enjoyed jewelry, but just really haven't worn it a lot lately. I have been wearing earrings again, which was weird to get used to, but I really like studs. Dangly earrings are cute, but I don't like them on myself. They're not comfortable and I feel like they're so heavy on my earlobes. I also have been re-obsessed with my watch. I remember I spend so long researching watches and picking it out when I was 17. When I got it for christmas that year, I was THRILLED. And now I recently started wearing it again. Luckily it's something that doesn't go out of style. It's so pretty! And I always know the time, now. LOL. Watches: first for beauty, then for telling time. Ohh and rings. Bringing back the rings, too.

My watch <3

My pastel nails (this color>>>>) & blingy ring!

I have been trying to be more stylish in general. This is the kind of look I want to embrace more. I really love this outfit I put together last week. It was comfy and felt so springy.

And the BEST 

part is that all of this

is from WALMART!

Full outfit for under $20

all on sale

#WIN

What are your favorite spring trends?

Happy St. Patrick's Day

I really don't know why we celebrate this holiday. I don't know the meaning behind it. I really don't know anything about why it's around. But I do know some weird traditions I associate with it and that I've experienced so I thought I'd share.

1) Wearing green! My mom always told us to wear green or else we'd get pinched. And she would pinch us if we weren't. Lol I don't know why that is a thing. Do other people do that? I'm pretty sure I will always make sure to wear green in some form.

2) Shamrocks...and more recently shamrock shakes (YES!) I've never found a four leaf clover. That's the same as a shamrock, right? I think I heard the odds of finding one are like 1 in 100,000...or 1 in 10,000? Either way, rare.

3) Leprechauns and gold...that seems so stereotypically Irish. I wonder if that's offensive?

4) Green beer is apparently something they do in town. I don't like beer. EW. But it's kinda a cute idea.

5) It's 6 days until my birthday!! woot woot. That has always been something I thought of on St. Patrick's Day


Do you do anything special for St. Patrick's Day?

Spring is springing!

I really thought spring was NEVER going to come. We got up to 50 degrees the other day and it was BEAUTIFUL. So now I'm definitely more hopeful all the snow and ice will someday melt. And I'm excited! Since yesterday was ranty, here are some happy things. Reasons I love spring.

1) My birthday! March 23rd. Some years it's cold and snowy. Some years it's warm and sunny. But it always involves presents and food so that's something to be excited about.

2) Being able to go outside without freezing. Without a coat! I'm so excited to be able to ride my bike again. It's so relaxing for me. And go to the park with my sisters. Yay.

3) My cat will also be happy HE can go outside and go for walks and just enjoy nature, which makes me happy.

4) I don't have to bundle up so I get to wear flip flops and short sleeves again! New, more colorful fashions in general. And not being freezing, in general.

5) I can break out the pastel nail polish in high volumes. I sneak it in here and there during colder months, but it's much more trendy in spring.

6) Driving with the windows down or even the cool air blowing through the vents. YES!

7) My skin not being so dry is always a plus.

8) Being able to do more things that don't cost money. Cause hanging out inside gets boring. And everything except doing outdoor stuff costs money.

9) Seeing baby bunnies and wildlife coming back is always welcome. I love bunnies.

10) NOT having to warm up my car. And it turn, being able to let my gas tank get lower before refilling it. Such a rebel.

What are your favorite things about spring? It's probably my favorite until the bugs start coming out. But after this winter, I'm welcoming warmth.

Library Probs

So I'm currently at the library using their computers and internet because, as I mentioned last post, my wifi is acting up and I couldn't figure out how to fix it. There have been times before I have had to come to the library to get internet and while it's a nice option, there are several issues I have with it. First world problems, I know. But maybe some of you can relate.

1) NO PRIVACY
Not that I'm doing anything bad. I just feel awkward with people all around me while I go on my social media or whatever.

2) Time limits
Depending on where you're at and how busy, they will limit your time. This one gave me an hour and since it's not super busy, they keep extending it 15 minutes at a time. But it is a tad frustrating when you're in the middle of something.

3) This keyboard

I somehow managed to sit at the desk area seat with a little more room, but it has this ez keyboard. It's huge and hard to type on if you're used to your fingers going in a certain area. And my wrists are digging into the edge of the desk. Ow.

4) Volume
I'm so self conscious my computer will make noise and people will judge. I even have headphones, but am paranoid they will unhook. I mute the volume whenever possible. I always did that at the school library, too.

5) Comfort
I have to be sitting at the chair. I can't lay down. Or take my pants off. Boo. And no food!

6) Hours
The library is only open until 9 pm. I would typically be on the computer much later than that. It's my entertainment in bed, before I sleep.

Anyway that is my rant for the day. It definitely isn't my favorite option, but I am glad it IS an option when I don't have another one. SCORE.

Technological Troubles

I like technology...for the most part. But there are a lot of things I don't like about it. Mainly the fact that it is controlling our lives. Whether we want it to or not. It's everywhere. You really can't escape it unless you live off the grid, which isn't possible for most people. It's used for almost everything in our daily lives. We are what Albert Einstein was afraid of. Mindless zombies. Slaves to our devices. Kids growing up are experiencing MUCH different things than their parents- and their parents. Cell phones in elementary school. iPods. Tablets. Laptops. It's everywhere. Especially in schools. Kids are losing face to face interactions and they're going to all be a group of socially awkward adults. Talking on the phone, using professional language and mannerisms. Yeah, we're screwed. Now, I'm aware of the problems it causes, but I'm still just as guilty. I love being able to connect with people all over about common interests- livetweeting tv shows! Emailing is easier than picking up a phone. And if I don't get to check my email before I start the day, I feel like my day is off. It's especially apparent how much I utilize technology when it doesn't work. Because it frustrates me to no end. I really dislike not being able to control a situation. Not that I have to control people or anything like that, but I don't like feeling helpless. The last few days my wifi has not been working. I've had to go to the library, which is not my favorite thing to do. It doesn't leave you with privacy and you have time limits. Plus I don't feel comfortable, even though I'm not doing anything bad. So it is affecting me. My social interactions, my couponing, my entertainment. We don't have cable either, so pretty much if I'm at home, I can watch netflix on the one tv that somehow is getting a connection. Anyway, I try not to let it bother me. There were times I lived without any techology. A few years ago when I lived with my uncle we didn't have internet or cable. I don't even remember what we did for fun. And years before that before technology is what it is now. I grew up without a computer. I think we got one when I was 10 and even then AOL internet was NOTHING like internet today is. It makes me realize how dependent I am on it. And unfortunately, I don't see that changing anytime soon.

Supernatural Reaction 3/4 "Thinman"

Can we just agree that I cannot post a reaction video by Wednesday? It never gets up on time because something or other happens. So better late than never, right? And remember, if you want my reaction as it happens, follow me on twitter @stephtuma where I live tweet every episode.

This episode was AMAZING! I loved it so much. I think the writers sensed we needed a happier episode because we have seen a lot of sadness lately. And they delivered. The boys were all most back to normal, joking about old memories. It was a real old school type hunting episode. the type of episode they had in the earlier seasons. It literally made me so excited. We were able to forget about the number problems for an episode (abaddon, Crowley, the mark of Cain, Metatron) and see our favorite boys in action and not tormented. Dean even smiled AND gave us a "son of a bitch"!  Also, the ghostfacers were back, which always makes for hilarious times. it was a super quotable episode.

SPOILERS AHEAD...PS typing on an off brand super touchy tablet is kind of impossible.

The episode was based off on slender man, but I guess that was copyrighted so we got thin man. Which also did look like the silence from doctor who. But I'd like to point out, slender man did come first. I love doctor who, but supernatural is my favorite and I hate when people claim it rips ideas off other shows, when if anything, it's inspired by pop culture. this episode showed this well, with a lot of references us internet obsessed could related to. When one of the ghostfacers said he had been punched in the feels, I was screaming "THAT'S THE AUDIENCE EVERY EPISODE!" haha

The ghost facers (well two of them) were working the case, which Dean was not happy with. They ended up finding out of the ghostfacers was photoshopping a lot of the evidence to get his friend to stay with him instead of leaving "hunting" for a girl he liked. In reality, a police officer (of course) and a diner worker were in on it and actually posing as thinman and killing people.

There were A LOT of parallels between the two ghostfacers failing relationship and Sam and Dean's. Which I think made Sam at least realize how much his brother cares. It ended kind of up in the air so we don't know what to expect AND they're making us wait 2 weeks again for another episode. AH.

The Most RANDOM Survey!

I thought this might be fun. The Best Random Survey

How many phones have you gone through?

I believe I'm on my 7th. Yikes. But only 1 has actually broke.

What was your favorite Disney movie growing up?

I never could sit through long movies as a kid, but when I was older (11ish?) I liked Mulan.

Can I call you home dawg?

Surveys can't call people names.

Do you drink often?

No

Are you supposed to be doing something else?

Nope

Come up with a new word. What is it and what does it mean?

Hyle, to hike a mile

If you could wear only one clothing item at a time what would it be?

Dress so I would be covered 

Are you superstitious?

somewhat

Did I spell superstitious wrong?

looks legit

Are white walls boring?

Depends. Sometimes. I love tan for walls.

Any teacher youve ever had thats made a lasting impression?

What they've taught me, yes, but not really anyone as a person

Are gingers soulless or is that a myth?(;

def true

Whens the last time you doubted someones gender?

that doesn't frequent happen

Are you sleep deprived right now?

no, but i could go for a nap

Do you like kids?

Some, yes. Some are bratty and ain't nobody got time for that. But overall, they're cute and innocent

How many of your friends have names that start with the letter E?

idk 1?

When was the last time you were late for something?

the dentist a couple weeks ago and I'm NEVER late so that is rare

Is your favorite sport to watch the same as to play?

I don't really watch any sports or play any lol

Do you get offended easily?

No. I'm thick skinned, but if you insult my family, then it's over

Worst advice youve ever recieved?

To lie. I'm so not into lying. 

You can have anything you want..but for only 24 hours. What is it?

My loved ones back that have died

Do you think your answer above was greedy?

No, but if so, then I don't care

Thoughts on Oprah?

#rich

Do you get paper cuts a lot?

not too often

Dont cha think hand sanitizer is a life saver?

it's nice to have when you can't wash your hands, but i think it's unhealthy to constantly put on. and it BURNS cuts!

Do you write everything down?

I try to or I forget things

How big is the biggest TV youve ever seen?

idk 60 in?

Are you holding something against someone?

I try not to, but deep down yes I think so

How long have you lived the the country you are living in right now?

Mahhh whole life #merica

If I touched the last place on your body you touched would it be awakard?

No

What sound does a duck make?

There is no way to spell it so quack quack is closest i guess

Do you impress yourself often?

kinda

Would other people rate your looks significantly different than your rating

idk and idc

Did you notice that there wasnt a ? in that last question?

don't think so

So does that make you an observant person?

that isn't representative of my observant-ness as a whole. i usually am. sometimes i'm def not.

Smothies are the bombdiggity. Correct?

yes

No one even uses that word anymore. Think it will have a comeback?

maybe but not anytime soon