Dwelling never helped anyone

Do you remember being little and the dumb fights you would get into with your siblings? The stupid things you would get mad about? At the time, they meant everything and were completely valid. Looking back, they were foolish. I was thinking about this the other day. I spent SO much time getting angry about ridiculous things. But you can rationalize that to kids. I sure as heck didn't listen to my parents when they tried telling me it wasn't something to get upset over. And my dad always said when I was older I understand. He was right. He always is. Experience is the greatest teacher.

It just really makes me frustrated all the time I wasted being mad for essentially no reason. That's another reason why I feel so strongly about being positive. I was the absolute worst dweller. When something upset me, I would constantly think about it and constantly feel bad wishing it could have went differently. But unless you're a time traveler (which I sadly am not), you cannot go back in time and work things in your favor. I remember in high school it got so bad, I would visualize putting my problems into a suitcase and letting them go. And it did help. But adulthood stresses led to anxiety and it was difficult to manage. If something happens that would normally make me angry, I try to think:

Will this matter tomorrow? Next week? Next month? Next year? In 5 years?

Focusing on the bigger picture, really puts your little issues into perspective. Things that seem like a huge deal at the time, most likely aren't. So next time you're in a similar situation, remember the things you thought were such an issue as a child and what they mean to you now. It will really make you think.

Over the hill?!

Yesterday was my birthday!!! And I turned 24. That is old. It is crazy to me I can be that old. My mom was already done having kids by my age. I thought I would be done with college and have my life together by now. I definitely thought I would be dating the guy I would soon marry. Yeah, life had other plans. But I'm not unhappy at where I'm at. Everything has led me to here and I think I'm figuring out things everyday. I feel blessed that I have the opportunity and support to be able to "find" myself. At times, it's hard. People don't always understand me or why I'm not just taking the normal path. I am not a typical person. .I do things my own way. I don't think I'm made for a normal everyday life. Regardless life doesn't come with a manual. I try to take everything as a learning experience. Having regrets gets you nowhere. At least if you learn something from a bad choice or situation, it wasn't for nothing.

Growing up is terrifying and horrible and times. As Taylor Swift got spot on in her song "22"

"We're happy, free, confused, and lonely at the same time. It's miserable and magical"

Exactly.

We wish our youth away, not appreciating it. Not realizing it will be over before we know it. Not knowing that being an adult isn't as fun as it looks. It's actually not fun at all, sometimes. Being responsible for yourself. Paying bills. Having to do the right thing instead of the fun thing. Having to be realistic instead of spontaneous. It's not what we thought it was.

I think this generation especially is especially burdened by this. It isn't like it used to be. College is almost necessary. And expensive. You don't just get married, move out, and live your life. You have to take care of yourself. The dating scene is insane. It just is a different era.

I know I can't be the only one who cries watching "Toy Story 3" The struggle is real. First world problem, I know. But it's a problem nonetheless. Figuring life out, while having so many other things to deal with and figure out, is HARD. It's a game of trial and error. Sometimes there is no right answer. You disappoint people along the way and realize you're the only person that can make you happy. You're the only person who knows everything that goes through your mind. You're the one that has to live with yourself. You learn to not care what people think- even though you sometimes slip and care. A lot. You question decisions and second guess yourself. You have amazing times with people who mean the world to you. And you have horrible times where you feel completely alone. When you take a breath, you realize you are lucky to have what you do. Your life isn't perfect. There are things  you wish were different. But it's your life. So you embrace it and do the best you can with it. You realize nobody ever really has their "shit together". We all just do the best with what we have. You learn your parents aren't perfect and struggle with some of the same things. You learn they're human. But you still know they have answers you do not and you constantly learn from them. You want to use your experience to help others not make mistakes and it drives you crazy when they don't listen. Everyone wants to figure out things on their own. And at the end of the day, that's exactly what I'm doing.